ENDGAME - Part Two: Keller
Look at his little fingers go. Tappin' away at you. Calling you
out. You know he's aiming for an eyefuck but it comes off
adorable. He's your own little beaten up three-legged puppy.
He's so sweet. You had to hand it to him. The sweetest. The
dull blue of his eyes with their long lashes fluttering on your skin
when you managed to steal some hack-free time. Sweet like the
light hairs on his body.
He was above the stink of this place. He didn't smell like a guy
that's for fucking sure.
Everything about him was different. His hands too, which were
soft and smooth. His face, the way you like it best, also smooth.
He was getting too skinny though. He never eats anymore.
*Hey, didn't think that I noticed, huh? Yeah, well...I've been
watching you like I always do.*
He had become wiry and lean. Scrawny, even. He felt so small in
your arms the last time. Before the world turned to shit.
But fuck that. Don't even think about it.
Look at him stare at you, his look giving up nothing. He's gotta
Or maybe he just wants you. Of course he does. Sick fuck.
Christ, you're getting hard. Better move, don't wanna give him
*Love the way you look at me, makes me go wild.*
Your eyes widen coyly and you smile at him.
The many faces of Tobias Beecher, you know them all. At least,
you think you do.
Happy, he made you feel happy like a gold star sticker from the
one teacher who didn't think you were a freak.
(You fucked her years later as a thank you, don't think she
recognized you. But that's another story.)
The dead look, so far away you'd kill someone to bring him back.
Or the vengeful and plotting look, that one was the worst. It was
so cold. You just want to get in his face and make it change.
Any way you can.
To the last look.
The way he looks when he's taking it. Nah...more like, the
*change* in his face when he's being taken. He takes you there
with him. You could get off a thousand times with just that.
With him, you know you're hitting something.
He's so open, so fucking raw. Kinda like a little kid. Sometimes
you can't believe that he doesn't walk through life crying.
Sensitive. Yeah, that's the perfect word. All around sensitive.
His body has all these marks to prove it. When you grab his arm,
his face, his thigh, it doesn't take much to leave a mark on his
skin, the red outline of where your fingers had been.
These cunts have no idea what he's got. Underneath that crazy
guy act, he's a beautiful thing. Keep prying him open and that
first look at the pearl was always a complete fucking dream.
It can feel good to have someone like that. Someone who needs
you so much, wants you so much they would rather destroy every
fucking thing in their life than move on without you. To prove
that to everyone. Like Bonnie.
Someone like that could turn on you at the first sign of trouble
For someone who was supposed to be so smart, Mr. Society
Lawyer was a complete dumbfuck. He listened to other people's
lies about you and believed them. Didn't even think to ask you.
He thinks you're capable of *anything*. He has *no* idea what
you're capable of, but you're really, really dyin' to show him.
*I hate you, ya fuck.*
You tilt your face slowly at him as you think this.
Most of the time you spent with him you didn't have it in you to
hear him go on and on about his fuckin' poor me guilt. Him
rubbing his do-gooder, "I wanna be forgiven" bullshit in your
face all the time. He's so fucking naive, he'll believe anything.
Anything to make it all right. He has no real clue how their world
operates, no matter what jizz he tries to pass off as his.
*Newsflash, Tinkerbell, this ain't Never-Never land or the
fucking Yellow Brick Road. There ain't no peace here and all the
wishes in the world won't buy you dick.*
When he was like that, with the whole atonement bit, you just
wanted to make him...Shut. The Fuck. Up. So you would, in
ways that worked. A smile here or a touch there. Maybe both at
once. That didn't always deliver though. Sometimes, you had to
dig deeper and come up with different distractions. Shit,
whatever does the trick, you're up for it. You ain't stupid, far
from it, though you're happy to let people believe otherwise.
*Got you quiet now, huh, pal?*
You trick yourself into thinking you can hear his breathing
through the division of glass and space, sounding even and slow.
It was happening again. No doubt about it. You know that the
game is still on, no matter who has the upper hand. Is he gonna
bring it? The anticipation feels like a burn. Who would win this
time? What's the prize gonna be?
You rub your mouth back and forth slowly across your forearm.
You bite down, first gently, then with pressure. Until you break